If your mate suffers from an addiction, you have probably woke up wondering why you got married in the first place. Some people blame themselves for not seeing the signs sooner, but you can’t blame yourself for not being an expert when it comes to drug and alcohol abuse. Plenty of addicts are functional, meaning that they are able to hold down jobs, attend family functions and avoid doing jail time simply because they don’t appear to be what a stereotypical addict is. You don’t have to live in a cardboard box and sell your mother’s wedding ring in order to qualify as a genuine addict. Likewise, addicts don’t always exhibit extreme behaviors such as violence, but they are often incredibly deceptive and can become increasingly secretive. True addiction can include anything from someone that drinks a little too much every night and then constantly incites arguments, to an injured person having to rely on an increasing amount of painkillers just to function each day.
Before you think about how to save your marriage, you should be focused on saving your spouse’s life. Left untreated, an addiction can claim the life of your mate while their actions may put everyone in your immediate circle in danger. You may be shocked to learn of the things that your loved one has done to keep up their charade, but it can be devastating to learn that they have lied to you all along. Realize that addicts are still people who deserve love and are capable of giving it as good as they get it. Finding out that your loved one has secretly been nursing a serious addiction doesn’t mean that he or she is a bad person, but it should prompt you to look for free marriage counseling online. Even if you do it by yourself, you can find a wealth of information on how to deal with a spouse that is suffering from addiction and develop a plan that will allow you to proceed with confidence.